“Die Vexor. Um…eat missiles or something…” Syeed sighed as he dispatched yet another Pandemic Horde ratter.
“Scratch another bogey, Dirtbag 1,” Hummingbird chirped as the pirate warped away from the smoking wreckage. “Securing the loot. Say, is there something bothering you? You don’t seem like your usual enthusiastic self.”
“Well this project is obviously going well, Hummingbird,” Syeed told the spy as he ascended to the interdimensional zone. “Almost too well. The Philosophy of Lurking is obviously successful on a surprising scale. Who knew that simply trying not to die in PvP engagements would result in so many kills? I’ve massacred dozens of Vexors. Algoses, Ishtars, a Navy Drake, a Noctis, mining barges, Ventures, etc etc. I have never in my life had so many killmarks on a ship.”
“So where’s the problem, boss? We’re making good isk too. Our little operation is well on its way to becoming one of the top dealerships for Drone Damage Amplifier IIs in the Kalevala Expanse, not to mention the faction loot that the Ishtars drop.”
“Well, as you recall from reading my blog, before my last hiatus I had gotten my mojo back as a solo PvPer in lawless space. I was pretty happy about that, but I was still trying to find fights mostly by traditional roaming, and relying on the Philosophy of Unconstrained Belligerence. Sometimes I was spending 2 or 3 hours hunting between each kill. I also was taking quite a few dumb losses. I dabbled at filamenting and ESS robbery a bit, but neither one really worked out for me.”
“Yes, Dirtbag 1. I seem to recall…uh…reading about that in your blog,” the spy replied.
“So I came up with the Philosophy of Lurking as an experiment, looking for a way to consistently get PvP action with very limited playtime. As you can see, it has worked well for us.
“However, I also had some other ideas I wanted to try. But when we started this I decided that I would not leave R1O-GN until I lost my ship. I never expected that it would take more than a week. I’m beginning to think that Pandemic Horde is simply not capable of killing me. I admit I’m getting a little impatient.”
“Well, it’s true that they are pretty bad,” Hummingbird mused. “Oh hey, I’ve got eyes on another Vexor.”
“Roger,” Syeed said, dropping to normal space and warping to the anomaly.
The cruiser floated blithely, watching it’s drones engage the NPCs. “I’ve got point. Missiles away,” Syeed said. Soon the Vexor exploded. The pirate orbited the wreck.
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“Dirtbag 1, you’d better get out of there. I’ve got multiple bogeys on short scan,” Hummingbird chirped.
Syeed grinned. “Time to go home,” he said.
Seconds later, dozen of ships dropped out of warp - the Standing Fleet had arrived. Syeed target locked the closest ship. “UNCONSTRAINED BELLIGERENCE!” he gurgled through pod goo, and fired his missiles.
A hail of missiles, colorful lasers, and assorted projectiles made short work of his Navy Osprey. Syeed felt a concussive thump as the ejection charges threw his capsule clear of the smoking wreckage. He immediately engaged his warp drive and zoomed away to a safe waypoint, leaving the celebrating Pandemic Horde standing fleet behind.
“Ha ha, you crazy boss,” Hummingbird laughed over comms.
Syeed chuckled. “I figure I have to let them have a win every once in awhile,” he said as he initiated his capsule’s self-destruct sequence. “I was worried about their low self-esteem. Now, on to the next phase!”
His senses perceived a flash of light as a cocktail of euthanasia drugs were injected into his brain stem via his capsule interface. Then the self-destruction charges breached the pod itself, leaving Syeed Ameer Ali’s lifeless, frozen corpse floating in the void of space.
to be continued...
Nullbears killed - 40
Losses - 2
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